Blow Me Away

I found this short story I had written a while back (obviously, a long while back: the XBox 360 hadn't even come out yet!) and thought I'd share. Very few people will understand it in full :P

Jake sat on the edge of his bed, an unmade one at that, but none the less it was a bed. Dave was sitting next to him (both of whom were of the British variety), and his other two friends, who were in fact girls (and of the American variety), sat on the floor. Each held a black game controller in their hands, staring at the television screen as if it had sucked the life from them and their bodies were now zombies within its power. The screen was split into four sections- one section for each player. The objective of this game was to kill each other, and try not to be killed by another. They sat in the dark, their faces lit by the T.V. screen, and eyes wide. They were playing Halo on the X-Box gaming console, which was actually soon to be outdated by a newer version coming in October: the X-Box 360. They however, didn’t care at the moment. They were focusing entirely on the game.

            “Damn it!” Dave cursed. Katie giggled a bit,
            “What?” She asked.
            “Jake’s character blew me up with a grenade!” Jake laughed,
           “Damn right I did! I kicked your sorry arse!”

          Meg and Katie laughed along with Jake, as Dave sat there still staring at the screen intensely and plotting his revenge. It wasn’t long before Meg and Katie battled each other, and both ended up dying. Then Jake and Katie met, and Jake won. Meg guessed it was because Katie had somewhat of a soft spot for him, and went easy. However, he probably went easy on her too. Then, Dave and Jake met again. Katie and Meg watched with interest as Jake attempted to run Dave over with the Warthog. But Dave had concealed a secret weapon- the rocket launcher. One pull of the trigger would release an explosive blow in Jake’s direction, throwing him out of the jeep, and possibly to his death. Jake swerved in every direction making the aim hard for Dave, but Dave hit him. Luckily, Jake hadn’t died, only lost an enormous amount of health. But there was still one problem: Dave still had a rocket launcher. But, what Jake didn’t know, and Meg and Katie did (after glancing at Dave’s fourth of the screen), was that Dave had used his only rocket on blowing Jake out of the jeep.

          Jake decided to make a run for it to the next shelter. Hopefully, there he would find health and a rocket launcher. Dave drew out his sniper rifle, and hid behind a rock, then zoomed in on Jake. He pulled the trigger. One blow to the head and Jake was on the ground. But, before Dave could celebrate his victory in vengeance (or even smile), he took a blow to the head as well and was dead. Katie had been behind him the whole time and he hadn’t known. But now, only Meg and Katie were left on the battlefield, and Meg knew where Katie was.

          Katie was armed with a pistol and assault rifle, both loaded. Meg with a sniper and shotgun, one shot left in the sniper. Meg was on the top of a building structure and looking down on Katie. She could take a shot, but she had to be careful with only one shot to give. Dave and Jake had been brought back into the game by now, but were both too busy watching Meg and Katie to want to do anything with their characters. Meg took a shot at Katie, and missed. But now Katie knew where Meg was and she was coming for her.

          Meg made a run for it, and hid inside the building she once stood on top of. Katie ‘accidentally’ glanced at Meg’s screen and noticed where she was, and there she found her. They rapidly began to shoot at each other with pistols (Meg had picked one up after she had entered the building to replace her empty sniper). Then they both drew their better guns: Katie’s assault rifle and Meg’s shotgun. Now, anyone knows, a shotgun would be the best weapon chosen for a battle like this, but not when you only had three blows left. Of course, she had plenty a chance to kill Katie… she would just have to make every shot. She shot her once, and received a chest full of bullets back. Then she made her second, now keeping distance from Katie making sure not to get shot too many times. Then she made her third, and missed. However, after a few more shots hit Meg, Katie was empty too. But, Katie had one thing Meg didn’t: grenades. She threw all four of them at Meg, who didn’t escape, and died. Katie couldn’t even escape her own trap, and also died. 

          After this, Jake and Dave noticed their characters were standing side by side, and Jake took a shot to Dave’s head, ending the game.

            “Yes!” Jake shouted cheerfully.
            “That is not fair! It’s not even possible!” Dave argued, “You can’t be brought back standing side by side! It’s impossible!”
            “Who cares?” Jake said, “I won!” He stuck his tongue out in Dave’s face, Dave pushed him away.
            “Remember the deal?” Jake asked everyone, they all nodded, “The two with the highest scores get to play cooperative mode and kick alien ass!” He reminded anyway.
            “Who won?” Katie asked. Dave straightened up, he was certain he had won with his great Halo skills.
            “Meg and I!” Jake said cheerfully, he held his hand out to Meg for her to shake. She smiled and shook his hand. 
           “Congratulations! You get to play with the legendary ‘Jake-inator!’” Jake complimented.
           “Uh…thanks.” She said slowly.

          Meg and Jake began their game, and Katie got up from the floor to sit with Dave. He was the only one, aside from herself, that wouldn’t soon be a zombie- meaning, he was the only one she could talk to and get a response. She noticed that after all of the losing he had done, his ego had slightly shrunk.

Nightmares of Heterosexuality

Current Mood:  High

 

The door was ancient. Splintered and cracked… metal cut through the wood elegantly holding the hinges in. The clock to his left read 3:09. He stuck in the ancient key and twisted it to the door’s liking to reveal the other side. There was nothing there but an empty darkness- much like his mind. He seemed to see a boney fleshless hand emerge from the shadows. It beckoned him forward. He took a step into the darkness, obeying the beckons, though knowing they only existed in his mind. He could see nothing, hear nothing, and feel nothing. His senses were completely clouded by the darkness and there was no knowing where he was headed. He longed to believe there was a presence with him, a company, but there was none. He imagined that if the path were lit, he would have guidance by the black cloaked figure of death. But it was non existent. He was alone. Utterly, completely alone. He began to hear a low female voice echo through him. A voice that sounded much like Helen. He gripped his hair and gritted his teeth to keep himself form either attacking the darkness or crying. He strode forward, still gripping his hair. He slipped on a puddle of some sort that lay on the darkness beneath him. It smelt raw. Rotting flesh. He gagged, but forced back the burning in his throat. He shit his pants and let out a dainty rattle through his teeth. He fell to the floor, his face now immersed in the cold flesh and blood. The darkness began spinning around him and he felt himself begin to lose consciousness. The gore dripped down his throat, suffocating him. He spat, but it was no use. Helen’s voice was again apparent. A silver light appeared before him- taking the shape of a woman. It was Helen. Her sad and deeply lined face pierced him. Her voice trailed through the darkness.
             “Dave…”

He coughed up the remains of the nachos onto his beer sodden shirt. He caressed the Chelsea flag next to his bed and turned off the telly. He pulled off his dirty t-shirt and threw it onto the floor with the others. Then laid down close to Jake’s warm body and ruffled his hair.

            “Hey Snowflake!” he said, waking Jake.

            “Good morning, Sexy!” Jake replied obviously not noticing Dave’s bare, fat stomach.

            “Up for some tea and crumpets?” Dave asked. Jake nodded and they embraced each other briefly. Then Dave tied his robe around himself and made his way into the kitchen- he had offered to serve Jake breakfast in bed. As he filled the tea kettle, he wondered if that dream was hauntingly telling him he was still straight. The doorbell rang and he skipped to answer it. Just there was the test of his manhood. There was an undressed prostitute and a rather flamboyant prostidude. His mouth dropped open as he looked from one to the other.

            “What the bloody hell-” He broke off, not knowing what to say. He began to panic slightly as he found himself longing for the woman.

            “Pumpkin…” Jake said, reaching the door, “oh, visitors.” He started making eyes at the man there. Dave noticed Jake looking down at the man’s gifts.

            “How ‘bout I take the lady and you take the gentleman?” he suggested. Jake agreed. They had both found themselves that morning. All was well.

THE END

Meg
and
Nikki